FAQs about eating psychology coaching

Some brief answers to three FAQs I hear:

1. What is an eating psychology coach?

Eating psychology effectively addresses weight concerns, binge eating, overeating, body image challenges, and various nutrition related health concerns. As an Eating Psychology Coach, my approach is positive and empowering. I don’t see your eating challenges merely as a sign that “something is wrong with you” – but as a place where we can more fully explore some of the personal dimensions in life that impact food, weight and health. Oftentimes, our eating challenges are connected to work, money, relationship, family, intimacy, life stress and so much more. My training in this area is through the Institute for the Psychology of Eating.

2. Is what I do counselling?

There are some elements of counselling techniques that I will use but I don't dwell on trying to fix your past. Yes it is important to identify if past or present emotional or psychological circumstances or experiences have played a role in your beliefs or behaviours that are influencing your weight or other health problems, but then the main focus is on actionable, doable strategies that will get you results.

3. If I say that weight loss and food issues are not about the food, does that mean food or diet won't be addressed?

When I say it is not about the diet or it is not about the food, what I believe is that the focus of most weight loss programs is on controlling dietary intake and creating 'rules' for you to live by. This can only be a temporary fix and creates a lot of stress and angst. Good wholesome nutrition is important and if your diet is unbalanced or I believe there is a connection between your current diet and your challenges then yes nutritional changes may be required. Equally important to sustainable success is looking at what else is holding your back from achieving your health goals.

Are you food shaming??

Have you ever caught yourself 'food shaming'?? Judging another woman based on the food she is eating?

For many our constant focus on dieting, eating right, and losing weight means that we have a list of 'good food' and 'bad food'. And by virtue of those labels we too are either bad or good depending on what we eat. If I can't resist the cake then I have eaten food from the bad list and therefore I am bad. I must be punished and eat less at the next meal or do an extra hard workout that afternoon. 

If I eat good food then I am by association good and can congratulate myself and feel quite self - pleased. 

But food is neither good nor bad; it just is. 

Sure there are certain foods that are more nutritious and form part of a healthy balanced diet and there are foods that are devoid on any real nutritious value and thus are not best eaten at every meal or even every day. Despite being nutritionally deficient, these foods, such as cake, cookies, chips, etc still have some nourishing value. They can be comforting and pleasurable if eaten in moderation and with conscious choice. 

The labelling of food bad and our projection of this 'badness' onto ourselves when we consume them, is projected even further onto others that don't adhere to our rules. 

Have you ever been on a strict diet - no carbs, or no sugar or whatever the latest fashionable diet is and have become so convinced of its value that you can't understand how others are not living in accordance with your food rules. 

You silently judge Sally from the office for having New York Baked Cheesecake when you all go for coffee. How could she? Does she have no willpower? Does she not realise how many fat calories are in that little slice? 

Does a little bit of anger come up??

Deep down....you are envious. You are envious that Sally is blatantly enjoying herself while you are yet again going with out. Yet at the same time you feel a little superior for your willpower. Confusing isn't it. 

Its time to let go of judgment of ourselves and of others around food choices. 

If you are feeling great being on your diet and achieving your health goals that is great. If you are making food choices based on fear and rules around what is bad and what is good, life becomes just a little less pleasurable. 

There can be a balanced approach that is based on being in charge of food choices rather than trying to control food choices. 

Join me for a workshop that will provide strategies for achieving a nourishing approach to weight loss and body confidence. Click here Happy Healthy Groovy

Watch my short video on food shaming here.http://youtu.be/XaApxbNLt4Q

Stay Groovy

Kim 

Weight loss myth: If I just eat less I will weigh less

It makes perfect sense. Weight loss is just a matter of calories in, calories out. Right??

If our physiology simply operated in a vacuum similar to the laboratory where they burn food to measure its calorie load, then yes this formulae would work perfectly. But the problem is our metabolism and calorie burning efficiency is not occurring in a vacuum, it is occurring within the human experience. An experience that is not always perfect, contained or controlled. An experience impacted on by our moods, our history, our relationships, our work and internal chatter in our head that is constantly judging, assessing and measuring our value.

Weight loss strategies marketed in the mass media are very masculine in their approach, which means they are very goal focussed, number based and all about willpower and 'going hard'. However the statistics show that 95-97% of people who lose weight on a diet gain it back again within 1 -2 years. And so the cycle starts again - diet, restrict, achieve -> eat, let go, fail. 

The strategy so often employed by women is to go without breakfast, coffee for morning tea, boring salad for lunch, another coffee in the afternoon -- and so far you are feeling good, you are in control, you have the willpower to succeed. But come 4pm you are starving and somehow manage to devour anything that you can get your hands on. And the real kicker ...is that you didn't even really enjoy the food anyway.  

You feel like a failure. You clearly have no willpower and may as well give up. Right?

Wrong! The plain and simple fact is that you were hungry. Your body needs nourishment and energy from food. Restricting food intake is not only physiologically going to backfire through rebound overeating (aka the 4pm binge) but emotionally leaves you feeling unsatisfied, frustrated and p***ed off with your friends who seem to manage to stay slim and not be in a calorie counting frenzy all day. 

There is another way. A more nourishing path to weight loss and body confidence that will allow you to achieve the body you desire in a way that is not punishing or painful or setting you up to fail. 

The secret is relaxing and trusting your body wisdom. Learning to listen to your appetite, rather than fighting it. 

Can you, just for today, throw out the voice in your head that is assessing the calorie content/fat content in what you eat. For today, allow yourself to have an appetite.

Do you feel like chocolate cake for morning tea, the cake you have been denying yourself for the past 2 weeks of your diet? Sit quietly for a moment. Are you hungry? If yes, what is it your body really needs? If your inner voice is saying 'cake' then do the "Four Really Test". Do you really, really, really, really want it? 

If yes then take that cake, put it on a pretty plate, sit down and give that cake all your attention. Savour it, eat it slowly. And when you are finished do NOT feel guilty. Acknowledge how good that cake was and that it is ok you had a piece of cake. And I bet that because you allowed yourself to eat it with pleasure you will be quite satisfied with stopping with one piece, rather than mindlessly eating three pieces while standing at the kitchen counter. 

Check out my short video Eat Less, Exercise More and let me know how you went today. 

Stay groovy

Kim 
Happy Healthy Groovy

Why Superwomen Can't Lose Weight

If you are the average modern women chances are you are juggling multiple roles, responsibilities and stressors in your life…all while being immaculately dressed in the latest fashion, looking fabulous, slim and surprisingly wrinkle free.

The pressure to look a certain way, to have a certain body and to maintain the standards you have set yourself and have had set by society just add to the overwhelm you experience. Magazines and TV promote a quick fix approach that will supposedly work for every woman. You can’t help but buy into the idea that if you just each less and exercise like a maniac you will achieve your goals.

But this just isn’t working for you, at least not in a way that is sustainable or remotely enjoyable.

Four reasons why superwomen like yourself are not achieving the weight loss you desire despite constant dieting are:

• Multi-tasking is over-rated.

Just because you are good at multitasking does not mean it is good for you. When you are racing around and constantly feeling the need to achieve you are putting your system into a state of chronic stress that has a direct impact on your digestive strength and therefore your ability to lose weight.

Stress increases cortisol and insulin levels – both hormones impact on fat storage. Stress also reduces blood flow to the stomach, dramatically reduces enzyme secretions and significantly reduces your ability to digest and assimilate nutrients. When stress is on, digestion is off.

• Starving early, feasting late

Reducing calorie consumption is the first strategy for many women trying to lose weight, and the easiest way to achieve this is to stop eating breakfast and have light lunch. Your motivation is high in the morning so it is much easier to deny appetite early in the day.

However, come 4pm you are starving and will eat anything in sight, and then beat yourself up for being hopeless and having no willpower. This is not a willpower problem. This is simply your body saying…”feed me…you have not given me enough food today!’

Trying to starve yourself and ignore hunger signals will inevitably lead to overeating no matter how much willpower you have.

• You aren’t really hungry for food

A busy, frantic, externally driven lifestyle can leave you very disconnected from your body and emotions. Or maybe it is just a little to scary to stop and really feel what is going on for you.

Do you reach for food when you are bored? Sad? Angry? Learning to distinguish between emotional eating and real appetite is the key to preventing those out of body eating experiences – you know the ones – when you finish eating a packet of chocolate biscuits yet you can’t remember it.

•  Holding onto your inner Princess

During our 20s it is normal for women to be somewhat obsessed with their physical appearance and seek confirmation of their attractiveness from external sources. When you move into your late 30s and 40s the focus needs to change. Yes it is still important to take care with your appearance but this is a time for relaxing into your true worth and treating your body in a more nourishing way.

Dieting and exercise strategies that worked in your younger years are punishing and often cease to be effective later in life. Consider that this is time to stop being that Princess and to step into your power as a Queen: nourishing others and nourishing yourself. Your body will thank you.

For more on these points go to my website happyhealthygroovy.com.au and register for my free e-book

Eating Psychology Coaching is an exciting and cutting edge approach developed by the Institute for the Psychology of Eating. It effectively addresses weight concerns, binge eating, overeating, body image challenges, and various nutrition related health concerns. 

As an Eating Psychology Coach, my approach is positive and empowering. I don’t see your eating challenges merely as a sign that “something is wrong with you” – but as a place where we can more fully explore some of the personal dimensions in life that impact food, weight and health. 

Oftentimes, our eating challenges are connected to work, money, relationship, family, intimacy, life stress and so much more. By working on the places that are most relevant for you, success is more easily achieved. As an Eating Psychology Coach, I look to support you with coaching strategies and nutrition principles that are nourishing, doable, sustainable, and that yield results.

So what is with the hibiscus logo

Two things that are really important to me are colour and nature. I love bright colours that uplift the spirit and energise space and people. Likewise the ability to experience, see, touch and smell nature is essential to my wellbeing. Growing up in Tropical North Queensland probably gave me that connection with the sun, hot humid weather, and being outside all the time. 

More recently I spent 9 weeks living in Ubud, Bali as a volunteer English teacher at a youth centre. The Balinese use flowers to decorate everything, particularly their sacred statues and places and as part of the offerings to the Gods. Hibiscus and frangipani are collected everyday and placed reverently on statues of Ganesha: remover of obstacles.

Flowers were also placed behind the ear of both males and females after making an offering at the temple. I loved this aspect of living with local families and sharing their daily rituals. Even the most mundane item was made more beautiful by the flowers. 

So in creating Happy Healthy Groovy I wanted a symbol of what I want reflected in my practice. 

I want you to embrace your divine beauty, to let your inner goddess glow, and to tap into your intuitive knowledge of how to look after your body and mind. 

The hibiscus also represents, to me, summertime - the time of heat and energy and growth.

And that is what's with the hibiscus.

Stay happy, healthy and groovy

The groovy goddess

Relaxing into uncertainty

Learning to relax into uncertainty must be one of the most difficult things for most people living in modern western society. I know it is for me.

 

Uncertainty means we don’t have control over the outcomes, uncertainty means we can’t plan the details, and uncertainty means we have to have faith that all will be okay.

 

On the flipside, uncertainty provides opportunity for new moments, new discoveries, and serendipitous possibilities. Uncertainty can be exciting!!

 

Life, whether we like it or not, is a series of uncertain moments. We don’t know if we will be successful at the job interview; we don’t know if our relationship will last forever; we don’t know whether our loved ones will behere tomorrow; we don’t know if it is going to rain on Saturday.

 

So the more we can relax into uncertainty the less stressful life can be.

 

And this, my friends is something I am not doing very well at the moment. I feel overwhelmed with the uncertainty in my life, which is leading to indecision and a lack of trust. The thing I am most annoyed about is that, in reality all the change is just ripe with luscious opportunity and excitement. But I am stuck in worry because I don’t know what the exact outcome will be, and am therefore stuck in indecision. Indecision gives power to others – who WILL make decisions for you.

 

The first step is to acknowledge that it is okay to feel overwhelmed, everyone does sometimes and I have an awful lot going on right now. I think many people get very good at pretending they are okay by avoiding, ignoring, pushing down how they really feel. Most of us don’t like others to know that we are not doing anything but ‘super’. We won’t even admit it to ourselves.

 

Then really just ‘sit’ in the overwhelm/anxiety/fear….feel it. Where do you feel it in your body? Your stomach? Your shoulders? Don’t fight it or negate it or it will just get stronger or come back later.  What is it you are really feeling? For example, sometimes what we think is anger is actually fear. This is an uncomfortable step, and that is okay.

 

But then you must take action. Some of the uncertainty can be removed by making a decision…listen to you gut and just make a decision. It might be right, it might be wrong, but if you don’t make a decision someone else will and then they have your power, not you.

 

As for that which you have no control over…let it go, have faith that sometimes we don’t actually know what is best for us. There is a bigger picture unfolding that is as yet unknown and we cannot foresee.

 

Engage in some selfcare – take a bath, get a massage, walk outdoors and hug a tree, buy a new dress, whatever puts a smile on your face.

 

If life was certain, how boring would it be.

 

So today I choose to relax into uncertainty.

 

Tomorrow? Is another day 

 

Stay Groovy!

 

 www.happyhealthygroovy.com.au