The Key to Persistence

I am a persistent little woodpecker. I have always been persistent and committed to achieving whatever hare-brained idea that I have come up with. That doesn’t mean I don’t get sidetracked and run after bright shiny things – I do. It doesn’t mean I always fully complete a particular project – I don’t. As well as being persistent I am naturally curious and easily distracted by the opportunity to create new things and birth new desires.

As I reflect on times that I have exhibited dogged determination and refusal to give up and I compare those experiences to the myriad of half-assed schemes that I have charged into and flippantly tossed to the scrap heap because I became bored or because it all was too hard, I wonder what made a difference between those dalliances and the projects that I stuck at no matter what.

The difference was having an inner knowing that this goal was necessary, important and unthinkable not to achieve. I persisted when my gut wouldn’t let me give up, when I sensed the deeper importance of what I was doing. I persisted at things I enjoyed and gained a sense of purpose from. I persisted when the alternative was simply not an option.

 

If something isn’t important to your soul and isn’t enjoyable you are unlikely to keep going when things get tough. Achieving health and weight goals similarly must be important to you at a deep level, not just in order to fit in the size 8 jeans you used to wear, but important to your sense of who you are.

If the inner you is bubbly, outgoing and loves socializing with others, then it is important for your outer shell to reflect the inner you. Being trapped in a body that inhibits your sparkle is heavy – physically and spiritually.

Chasing weight loss goals through quick fix solutions doesn’t lead to inner change that is sustainable because it is a goal that doesn’t connect with your soul.

Being healthy should also be enjoyable, energising and positive. Weight loss that is driven by punishment and restriction is unlikely to engender persistence.

Weight loss that is driven by doing activities that you enjoy and make you feel alive are much more likely to be sustained and to become a lifestyle rather than an exercise program.

Achieving your health goals is not achieved through sheer force of your willpower but rather thorough persistent and consistent effort to be the best you can be, to feel energised and vital and to have fun getting there.

Having this persistence is not that difficult when you are focused on the right goals for the right reasons that lift you up, not weigh you down.

Stay groovy

Kim

Website: Happy Healthy Groovy

               

Courage

Courage

A self-belief and deep trust that the step you take is right, more than right, it is necessary. It is ordained by your higher self as the path you must take.

Courage can sometimes feel easy, maybe the blissful unawareness of youth provides opportunities for adventurous courage, the kind of courage that flips the bird to the world and charges ahead refusing to see consequences. Or even when consequences are vaguely identified there is a sense of flippancy. I mean, seriously, you have years to fix it/pay for it/divorce it/rebuild it. So lets go!

I have made many courageous moves in my time. Some have worked out really well and other not so much. I have sold my house and moved interstate to a temporary job with two kids. It worked out as I knew it would. I have headed off overseas on my own having never been out of Australia before. I have the best time. I took two months leave and taught English overseas at a youth centre. I adapted to being totally out of my comfort zone and met the most amazing people whilst learning what my next life transition was to be.

During my younger adulthood and despite quiet introversion I had a deep confidence in my ability to do and achieve, combined with the focus and patience to forge a path to my golden goal. I visioned, I imagined and I manifested. Sometime with steadfast stubbornness and self-centred pig-headedness, but I made it.

Looking back I am a little in awe of some of the decisions I have made and achievements I have worked hard for.

I think that as women we have a tendency to casually dismiss our achievements for fear of standing out, of being seen as arrogant. The tall poppy syndrome works well too keep us small.

Take time to contemplate the brave choices you have made or the incredible will you have exerted to achieve goals – small or big. Fantastic success or abysmal failures are all equally valuable. Each time you learn more about yourself and about others. None of which you would have learnt if you didn’t have the courage to step out of your comfort zone.

I am writing of courage today as I am at a juncture in my life. A turning point. A fork in the road. I need courage. I think I have courage but I am still hesitant. Why?

Is it because I have more to lose now that I am older? When all you own are a few bags of clothes and some furniture in a rented apartment, there really isn’t that much to lose. These days there seems to be more at stake and a sense of responsibility for another’s financial security.

I am confident and I have the self-belief and I have faith that this decision is my ‘destiny’, so why the hesitation I wonder?

I have realised it is because I feel selfish. I feel like my decision is all about me and my desires and for the first time I care about another’s needs in a way that makes me feel selfish to put pressure on them. Though I have to admit the ‘money thing’ worries me a little. The idea of having nothing is not appealing in one’s 40s. I like nice things and expensive shoes.

One thing that I do know, is that making no decision is what squashes spirit. Flailing around in awkward indecision is a recipe for disappointment and regret. In order for the universe to provide you with assistance you must first take action.

I am not quite there yet.

I have also learnt that if I don’t make a decision then others will chart my destiny and my power is taken from me.

I don’t like that.

What do you need to be courageous about?

Are you handing your power to someone else through indecision?

May we all step forward with confidence and trust this week.

Stay groovy

Kim

Website: Happy Healthy Groovy

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What is with the Wrinkly Knees?

In recent blogs I have talked a lot about change and more specifically the pain that can be associated with change.

One change that can’t be avoided is ageing. We all get older whether we like it or not and there are a number of realizations that hit a 40-something woman smack in the face.

Superficial things like not receiving looks from men when you walk down the street. A sense of being invisible to males is a general feeling I hear described by many women, myself included. That soft droopy bit of skin that lays across your eyelid, smudging your eye liner into your socket.

And what the hell is going on with the wrinkly knees?

Or more soulful changes like realizing your are not living the life you imagined, you ache for more purpose in your life, or your can’t stand the person you have become, or even the person that is lying next to you in bed. The things that used to make you happy seem meaningless now and there is a yearning for more purpose, more meaning, more passion.

Sure the big-M is an undeniable side-kick of ageing but the surprising thing for many women is the gradual, sneaky little physical and emotional transformations that happen after you hit 40. Apparently there is a name for the years that precede menopause – perimenopause.

I think the changes we experience shock us even more now than it did our mothers. We are blessed (or cursed) with living in the age of celebrity and cosmetic surgery that sets a very high bar for ageing. Jennifer Anniston, Halle Berry, Michelle Pfeiffer. Now surely that is what ageing is all about – bring it on!

Ah, not so much it seems. Even way before menopause hits, perimenopause brings a shower of lovely gifts that I didn’t know about. Hormones start to get a little unpredictable which apparently according to Doctor is due to my eggs being old and tired. What the hell!

Tired eggs, just kicking back and sliding out of my ovaries with a fizzle rather than with a pizazzy pop of progesterone like more youthful zesty eggs do.

This hormonal misfiring cause a range of niggle symptoms that while not life threatening are certainly party poopers. Body temperature fluctuations, irritability, anxiety, insomnia, irrational thoughts, fatigue, loss of mojo/libido, brain fog, and difficulty concentrating to name a few common symptoms.

The problem I see is that women can go down two opposing paths at this time: 1. They suffer in silence while their career, relationship and joy for life falls apart or 2. They are made to feel like they have a medical problem that needs to be fixed through prescription drugs.

Now sometimes drugs are good and this is your choice and you should get additional medical advice in addition to my ramblings.

However, I see the basic premise that perimenopause/menopause are medical disorders that need to be fixed as fundamentally wrong.

This is a challenging physical, emotional, psychological transformation that needs to be openly discussed and supported through holistic options and information that are made available to women.

There are some amazing medical doctors such as Drs Christine Northrup and Sara Gottfried who are speaking out about hormones and women’s health from a functional medicine perspective. A perspective looks holistically at the body rather than focusing on treating individual symptoms. A perspective that combines eastern and western wisdom to support women to achieve health and vitality in a positive way rather than as if they are broken.

There are nutritional, supplemental and lifestyle changes that do make a difference. Not to mention psycho/spiritual issues that arise during these years.

This is an area of health that I am passionate about and interested to share more information with you.

What is your biggest challenge you are experiencing, as you get a little older?

Stay groovy

Kim

Website: Happy Healthy Groovy

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Discomfort During Times of Transformation

There is a physiological phenomenon that occurs when you start a detox program or hard core cleansing diet. Its called ‘die off’ and it results from all the toxic bacteria literally dying off and entering the blood stream before they are processed and eliminated by the body. Essentially the elimination systems and organs that help cleanse our body of toxics and byproducts from digestion and other bodily functions are overloaded with an unusually level of these toxins as they die off en masse due to you removing their food source (e.g. sugars, alcohol, allergens, processed foods, etc).

During this die off phase of detoxification your body experiences headaches, flu-like symptoms, aches and pains. It is not a very pleasant process but it is a sign of healing and that you are on the right track to a healthier end stage. The discomfort can result in you giving up early and thinking it is all too hard or even that the symptoms are a bad sign that the diet is not working or even not good for you.

But if you can stick with the plan for 3-5 days, the massive die off of toxic substances can be processed by the body and you will start feeling the benefits of the cleanse.

I think any transformation or major change in your life has a die-off period – a stage where the pain of change seems worse that staying in the status quo. It can be easy to forget why you wanted to change when everything seems to be going to s#%%.

Change is uncomfortable. Maybe you will lose friends, maybe you will feel scared or out of your depth as you challenge yourself to a new level. Or maybe it will just feel like you have bitten off more than you can chew.

This is when the importance of having clarity about your goal comes to the fore so that you can regularly check back in with that desired end state. Reminding yourself of why you didn’t like where you were, and where it is that you are going.

If you are undertaking a substantial change in relation to your health it can help to be clear on two things. The specific goal – what exactly do you want to achieve. The desired feeling – what is it you want to feel when you get to the goal.

Going on a strict diet and exercise program because your doctor told you to it is probably not going to result in you sticking to the program. Going on a strict diet and exercise program because you want to experience the feeling of accomplishment and exhilaration of finishing the Kokoda Trail with your son is much more likely to result in sustained and consistent adherence to eating well and exercising.

When you have a clear goal and a clear idea of what the transformation will bring into your life, your motivation and ability to tough it out through the painful times will be greatly enhanced.

Lets not sugar coat the fact that change is tough and ingrained behaviours are hard to change. It is a lot easier to keep unhealthy habits and keep complaining about them, than to change them. Courage to step into the discomfort will change your life and I promise the discomfort won’t last forever.

Get support either from friends (be careful though, sometimes your friends won’t want you to change), like-minded groups such as Meetups or your gym, or from health professionals such as personal trainers, dieticians or a health coach.

Stay groovy

Kim

Website: Happy Healthy Groovy

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